2020, The Grief and Broken Heart You Have Given to Me

Granny and Me in 2017

2020, The Grief and Broken Heart You Have Given to Me by Chellyz View_

– Granny this is dedicated to you

No matter how much you try to convince yourself you will be strong as you watch a loved one transition from their earthly form to evolving into a spiritual being, it isn’t easy. At some point, my family and I knew we couldn’t be selfish because we wanted her to stay. During one of my last visits, I whispered in her ear and assured Granny that we would be alright because we didn’t want her to suffer anymore. A couple of weeks before she left us, her last prayer was, “Father, take me to the Heavens,” with her hands lifted to the sky.

On November 15, 2020, at 2:13 pm, on a cold and windy day, my Granny took her last breath, tiptoed out of her bedroom of 62 years, and peacefully walked into Heaven. I know she was welcomed by the Heavenly Father, ancestors, and many individuals she missed so dearly.

One and a half years old with my Granny

I don’t know about you, but 2020 broke my heart and, at times, my spirit more than ever. There have been other years where I have faced heartache and pain, but this year’s rounds of ups and downs have been more severe. Thanksgiving was very different this year. We didn’t have Granny, but we had each other. My family is small, but we have big hearts. This holiday taught me the importance of what courage and love from family truly meant though we may not always agree. We understood without a doubt that we can lean on each other. We smiled, laughed, danced, cried, and created new beautiful memories despite our sadness. I know Granny is proud of us!

First Family Thanksgiving without Granny 2020

Grief is very draining, and it can deplete every bit of you. It was challenging to grieve during this pandemic. Only so many people could attend the funeral and no risk of having a repass because we wanted to be cautious. As a grieving heart begins to heal, there will be those painful times when things seem so heavy. A challenging moment occurred while I was trying to find a song for Granny’s slide show. It was dark outside, and the tears began to flow while playing a rendition of “Grandma’s Hands.” Suddenly, the sun peaked through my window for a quick second. It felt as if Granny stopped by and hugged me right then, and I felt a sense of peace and thankfulness.

I must admit one of the most important lessons I learned this year is to be grateful for every minute. Family members, friends, legends, and famous people have been leaving this Earth in record numbers; it seems this year. Show appreciation to those you love before it’s too late. Try to forgive others and ask others to forgive you. However, if the efforts of resolving old wounds and binding broken relationships go awry, then it is time to let things go.

I know you heard this a thousand times (probably in a previous post), but life is too short to hold on to bitterness and anger. Life is too precious to hang on to people who keep reminding you of who or what you used to be. You know the ones who don’t know how to let go of the past. The present time is waiting for you to live life to the fullest with your presence even while navigating through grief!

Granny at her 70th Birthday Party

We are moving closer to a new year. I can’t promise you that soon as the clock strikes midnight in 2021, everything will be perfect. So, don’t wait for 2021 to find peace. Find it now. Be grateful now. Search for what can heal you now. Grow through this now. Learn to find a moment every day to practice thankfulness now.

It’s ok not to be strong all the time. Please know it is alright to lean on others that can help you. Reach out to someone now. Take care of yourself now. Look to the Holy Father to help you renew your strength now. 2020, you might have broken my heart in so many pieces, but step to the side while I welcome Love, Peace, and Happiness. I know with time time my grieving heart will slowly mend!

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

Jeff Lorber featuring Eric Benet. “Grandma’s Hands.” He Had a Hat, Blue Note Records, 2007.

Remotely stung while being at Home by Chellyz View

Earlier this year I wrote an article about 2020 being Canceled.  Yep, that was my buzzword.  However, I have a new word that is buzzing around like a busy bumble bee in my home and it stung me.  “Remotely.”

I’m working remotely from home.  My children are learning remotely from home.  I’m podcasting remotely from home.  Outraged about social injustices while watching the television remotely from home. Grieving about the violence in the hood or losing another legend as I scroll through social media while remotely at home. Overwhelmed with everything while adjusting to the abnormalities of 2020 as I sip on tea because I’m remotely dealing with the bulls@&# while being at home. “Remotely.” “Remotely.” “Remotely.” Ouch!

Earlier this year, I wrote an article about how being at home wasn’t that bad for me since I am an introvert at least 75% of the time. However, I also stressed that everybody that is remotely at home ain’t safe. Many adults and children are dealing with some heavy “ish” during this pandemic. Lord knows I am continuously praying for those and always trying to provide resources to help others and even myself at times.

Since this “remotely” situation has been going on, I feel the stinging sensation piercing through my body. The side effects included feeling tired and drained. One of my children is adjusting fairly well and maintaining a decent grade point average though they yell at the computer screen from time to time. The other child is walking on thin ice, and I don’t want them to fall and sink. At one point, I totally removed myself from the daily activities of everything because I just couldn’t deal or cope with it. That’s when this circumstance of being remotely at home started to feel painful.

Eventually, I had to recognize it was imperative to make ongoing efforts to find and maintain balance in my household. I’m learning to take small doses of the hardships of life instead of trying to digest big chunks of info at one time. Some days are good while other days feel like carrying a load of garbage. Ewwwww the Funk!

My heart goes out to parents who have more than two children in different grade levels while juggling multiple responsibilities. I try not to complain too much because many parents don’t have the option of working remotely at home while monitoring their child(ren) progress. They have the added stress of finding a reliable babysitter to help their child navigate through this learning from home situation.

So, there are times when I “mask up” and get in my car to change the scenery. There are times when I stand by the window watching nature as leaves on the trees transition from green to bright red or orange to eventually, they’re no longer visible. There are times when I lock myself in the bathroom to have a sacred space to meditate and get away from the busyness of life. There are times when I turn on the music loud and have my dance party even though my rhythm might be a little unsteady. There are times when I grab my mat and find peace while practicing Yoga.

If you have been stung by the plights of 2020, I encourage you to find a support group, call a friend, locate resources, or remotely remove yourself for a few moments to recover and heal.

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

I’m about to! By Chellyz View

I don’t know about you, but 2020 has me feeling, “Cray, Cray.” Not sure if people still use that phrase, but who cares! Hell, that’s how I feel! I have dealt with fear, frustration, confusion, gratefulness, thankfulness, sadness,  and unpreparedness. Well, I think you get the picture. Many emotions have invaded my body and mind to the point where I felt I needed to walk around with a do not trespass sign on my forehead. With everything that is going on I am learning how to navigate through these overwhelming amount of feelings.

If I am uncertain about anything, one thing is for sure; I have decided to adopt a phrase my children state often. Usually, when I ask them to complete a task or chore, their response in the abbreviated edition is, “I’m bout to.” Well, that is what I have decided to do. “I am about to” embrace this life like never before.

Though COVID-19 is still out there lurking in every corner of our lives, and ready to snatch the next victim, I can’t live in fear. I stay prayed up, masked up, and try to be as cautious as I can. This year, I have witnessed individuals who were too young personally and from afar leave this Earth before reaching half a century. Before I know it, if the Holy Spirit allows, I will be approaching that AARP stage. With that being said, I’m about to live each day with a purpose, plan, and peacefulness, as I have never experienced before.

On that note….

I am about to uninvite myself to arguments that take up my energy.

I am about to use my voice to advocate for myself. No, that doesn’t mean I am the angry black woman.

I am about to scream or curse as deemed appropriate to help me release tension.

I am about to finish projects that have been placed on my heart to complete before the end of the year.

I am about to become more disciplined to complete a certification I have been lazy about.

I am about to create my happiness when those around me disappoint me.

I am about to push depression to the side when it tries to consume my soul and accept help when needed to have a healthier mindset.

I am about to let others know their emergency doesn’t become my emergency, but I will offer the necessary resources when available to help them become self-sufficient.

I am about to love myself more.

I am about to make it clear others will not stress me out.

I am about to say no when I want to without guilt.

I am about to shed the unnecessary weight be it related to pounds or people that holds me down.

I am about to take risks when doubt tries to step on my toes and keeps me from pursuing my dreams.

I am about to accept accountability for my misjudgments and mistakes and continue to grow, heal, and move on.

I am about to stay encouraged when the enemy wants me to remain defeated.

I am about to get my finances in order.

I am about to focus on what is ahead of me instead of what has passed.

I am about to live my life to the fullest based on my terms.

I am about to walk with confidence when low self-esteem tries to persuade me that I am not good enough.

I am about to cry when I need to, laugh when I want to, and relax when I must.

I am about to stop talking about what I need to do and just put forth the effort to make things happen.

I am about to trust in the Holy Spirit more.

I am about to increase my faith and spiritual life.

I will add to this list if need be. Not one moment is promised to us. So, I am about to do what I need to do for my sanity. What about you? 

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

Don’t let your past get you messed up! by Chellyz View

shutterstock_570396466

Don’t let your past get you messed up! by Chellyz View

Wow! I witnessed my visions grow and expand by staying dedicated to the physical and mental assignments that needed to be done in my life. I was evolving into the human and spiritual being that The Holy Spirit designed me to be. The light within my soul began to gleam and brightened my path and offered inspiration to those around me. Then boom, I heard my past blasting in the room like the fireworks and the feelings took over like a Polar Vortex. Everything felt cold and there was a slight chill that hovered over my presence. This would happen from time to time. The memories, heartaches, my transgressions, and pain caused me to shutter. Have you ever been in a place in your life when you asked a Higher Power, “Why would you want to use me as a guiding force for change?” Then you hear The Holy Spirit reply, “Why not?”

I was pushed to write this today on Thursday, July 9, 2020, so my fingers had to jump on the keyboards to release my thoughts. I know there is someone out there who is going through this crisis, revolution, and time of uncertainty trying to figure things out or beginning to understand this is the time to activate your purpose. Now and again, your past gets you messed up though. You start telling yourself you don’t deserve the blessings, you can’t make a difference, or why would anybody want to listen to you because you just don’t feel worthy. Nope! Stop! Hold up wait a minute! We must not do that! Yes, we must realize we are not perfect but every single day we have the opportunity to awaken to level up and change the trajectory of our life. We can correct our misjudgments. We have the privilege of changing our path. We just have a right to do so!

Forgiveness

What? You didn’t know you have the right to not remain silent.  You must speak and demand your past to not control your life. You have permission to pluck those unwanted and unsightly deterrents to make room for you to see clearly and grow! You must leave those individuals behind that make you doubt yourself and have you believing that you will be defined by who you used to be! There is strength in your bones that will empower you to get right back up when you have failed. Don’t allow your past to get you messed up to the point where you can’t function. It’s time to operate out of excellence.

You might have an overflow of tears while celebrating how you overcame certain battles and situations. Let them lead you to a river of an abundance of happiness; not regret. Don’t allow the negative voice of others or the one creeping in your mind to tell you that you don’t belong where The Holy Spirit ordained you to be. I ain’t talking about the pulpit because we are not all meant to preach. However, we all have the power to teach through experience and life lessons.

God Forgives

Today, I don’t have any fluffy five steps to tell you how not to let your past get you messed up because you know I do from time to time. All I have are these words to encourage you. At this moment, I want to tell you that it is alright to live. Yep! Please let me stress to you that You are worthy! There’s a wholeness inside of you that makes this world complete by sharing your gifts, visions, and the brightness to warm this world when it seems a little cold! Go ahead love the person you are evolving into and shine!

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

How I made it to 100! by Chellyz View

 

Sunglasses 100

How I made it to 100! by Chellyz View

Can you believe I made it to 100! Look, I know you are thinking I can’t believe she made it to 100. I am not talking about my age. Logically, you are thinking about numbers but on a level of momentum, I am talking about blog posts! I am so thankful, but let me be absolutely truthful. I DID NOT MAKE IT ALONE!!!  Getting to 100 had me feeling a range of emotions from happiness, loneliness, excitement, disappointment, anticipation, nervousness, jubilation, frustration, progress, procrastination, and achievement.

A Heart Full of Conversations started off with a small statement back in 2011. Initially, the blog was going to be called “Havin Sumthin 2 Say.”  My Sister DeAnn Jordan was standing at my cubicle during a break. I said, “I want to start a blog about Detroit.” Of course, she offered her encouragement and that was that. Then my other Sister LaTonja Degraffenreid-Smith continued to offer inspiration about moving forward with my goals and that was that.  My momma, Wanda Betty, and my aunt, Sherry Betty always told me to follow my dreams and that was that.  A few years later I remember attending an amazing Vision Board party hosted by the empowering Cherisa “Do You See” Allen. At the event, I sat next to one motivational lady by the name of Kallista.   I was telling her I wanted to start the blog and how I needed to change the name once again and went on and on. Finally, she said, “Give Birth to It.” Yes, that is exactly what I was going to do, but that was that.  So many visions, words of positivity, and time kept on passing me by.

By 2016, I interviewed Pamela Duvall, the owner of Detroit Vintage Coffee and Tea House. Voila, and that was that.  At one point, I even felt a little burned out.  However, the Burn Out Coach Latanya Riggs checked me and pushed a group of us to keep pursuing our dreams and that was that.  A year later after interviewing Ms. Duvall, I published my first blog post on January 31, 2017:  https://aheartfullofconversations.com/2017/02/01/detroit-vintage-coffee-and-tea-house-the-oasis-in-my-neighborhood/.  After releasing my first post I was ready to crank out the articles. And that was that!

Suddenly, it felt a little overwhelming keeping up the content and working full time. A team of dedicated souls helped this sister and I am forever grateful!!! I asked my two sistahs Tresa Simmons and Marquesha Brooks to join me on the journey.  Tresa contributed invigorating articles about Women’s Wellness until she moved to AZ. Now, she is living her best life, published a new book, and fulfilling her entrepreneurial goals. Marquesha continues to share everybody’s posts while contributing sports content. Then Boom COVID-19 put a halt to that! However, my favorite Home Skillet will be back with Klassy K’s Sports Korner soon. Well, Hopefully! She definitely knows how to break down the sports and keeps you laughing at the same time.

Awwwwwww, then my Big Brother Mr. Butch Ford joined the team in 2019. His clever style of taking lyrics from songs and applying them to his writing is pure talent. Ford’s posts are thought-provoking and witty.  I see an R and B Blog Platform in the immediate future!!!

Please, let me also graciously thank alllllllllllllllllllll the wonderful individuals who have contributed their talents and written a post, and those I have interviewed over the years!!!!  Also, thanks to the individuals who are featured on the blog’s YouTube Page: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIlI7tJYvgXfeC3uvQxndFQ

My heart can’t thank each and every one of YOU enough!!!!!

Garden 100 pic

If you want to start a blog, make it happen. Remember, this walk is easier when you invite others to support you on the path. All I can say is I am thankful I made it to 100. Thank you to everyone who took the time to read, share, comment, and follow the page on Facebook and Instagram. It gets tough staying on the path to accomplishing my goals but I am doing so gracefully. I truly can’t tell you how long this platform will be around. For now, I will offer what I can for as long as the Holy Spirit allows. I’m so proud of myself. Best wishes to the bloggers who are trying or who have made it to 100. I wish you much success!!! And That is That!!!!

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

Photo Credit:  The Super Hero aka My Son

Background:  Greening of Detroit /  Michigan Ave. and Shelby / Downtown Detroit

Gotta Do Something by Chellyz View

Black woman screaming

Gotta Do Something by Chellyz View

I would be telling a story, but I guess this is what blogging is about telling stories. Right?  Anyway, I would be telling a story if I told you I was feeling like a Champ and everything smelled like fresh roses.  From social injustice, police brutality, crime in the neighborhoods, COVID-19, systematic oppression, overcoming depression damn…. I just got exhausted typing this all!!!  Last week, it felt as if the walls were caving in on me.  I was pissed.  I was angry.  I was suffocating.  Mentally a Sistah was weak.  I was about to faint.

Lately, the whole world has been in an uproar.  Daily marches and protests, virtual meetings, and discussions, social media flooded with feelings of frustration, and the news chatters of another incident, another death, and another life lost too soon.  This pain is piercing like the nails of a crucifixion.  I heard the squeals of a mother on repeat who is saddened by losing a child.  I saw the tears of children who are grieving because they keep trying to comprehend why their momma, daddy, or someone they cared about won’t be returning home. I experienced the hopelessness from families, friends, and the community losing their grasp because they are too weak to keep holding on from the attacks we face as a Black race.

warrior

This struggle started before I was pushed out of my momma’s womb.  Racism, poverty, and discrimination have been causing labor pains before my great, great, great, and let me add another great grandmomma even graced the earth. Heroin, Crack, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, broken homes, and gunfire have plagued these streets like the Bubonic wreaking mad havoc.  The stench is strong.  As soon as the black community gets a whiff of what it feels like to be stable the Earth shakes and knocks us down on our backs.  There’s smoke everywhere and it ain’t from the riots. We are being smothered by hate, destruction, and violence.

Though I felt weary last week, I know I “Gotta Do Something!”  So, from time to time I must power down.  I haven’t participated in any protests or marches but that doesn’t mean I won’t do anything.  Many of us have been doing what we can for a long time.  The weight of the cries, heavy hearts, and sorrows cannot be carried alone.  We all “Gotta Do Something” in our own time and in our own way.  We volunteer.  We speak.  We pray. We donate.  We organize.  We move.  We are always moving in hopes of better days, better tomorrows, better years, better decades, and better centuries.

I ain’t giving up but every now again I must pause so I can contribute to the cause. Your actions may be subtle or you may attack the issues while roaring like a lion.  Either way do something. Yes!  You “Gotta Do something!”

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

It’s Time to Fine-Tune Your Goals by Chellyz View

 

soundboard

It’s Time to Fine-Tune Your Goals by Chellyz View

The Need to Fine-Tune Your Goals

Once we get back into the groove of things, what will be the outcome of your business, organization, or life-long goals? For some, it will feel smooth as jazz or flow like the beats of Neo-Soul. Others may feel a little shaky like rock and roll, while some individuals may resemble the tranquility from the vibrations of an orchestra playing classical music. You may be wondering what and who inspired me to write this post. For one, the Trolls World Tour Movie released in April 2020, which I truly enjoyed.  Also, most definitely none other than my brother Mr. Butch Ford, who is gifted in analyzing any R & B classic or throwback song without thinking twice about it!  Yep, many relatable songs blasted through my mind while typing this post!!!!!

Anywho, I need you to stay in tune with keeping your business, entrepreneurial, and/or personal goals sharp in today’s ever-changing economy.  If you fail to frequently fine-tune your purpose you will feel like a losing contestant on Shazam who didn’t make it in time to recall the lyrics or title to their favorite song!

Now, let’s “Back it up!” As business owners, entrepreneurs, someone longing to build a stable organization or complete pertinent goals we just got to “Wobble” with it these days. There are many times we are taking small steps so we can stand tall, secure, and confident in what we do while going through this Pandemic. At times we “just keep on Fallin’ in and out of love” with the woes and accomplishment of being an entrepreneur or goal-setter. Finding our niche in life or a target market can be pleasing like music to the ears, but for others, it might sound like a whole lot of noise. Either way, if you have found your purpose, then it’s even more important to take notes and stick with a plan. In this post, I would like to briefly offer a little encouragement! I am appreciative of those who continue to motivate me and for the Holy Spirit who watches over me because I can hear Marvin Sapp singing, “I Never Would Have Made It Without You.”

Why Don’t They Support Me?   

I was aggravated with myself and having a rant, saying “Wah, Wah, Wah!” like a Lil Baby! Of course, I snapped out of it and stopped all the crying! I had to reassure myself to get over it and those who didn’t show support. I asked myself a few questions.  “Why am I  putting so much effort into my entrepreneurial and personal goals?” “Who am I trying to serve?”  “Am I trying to serve self?” “Is my purpose to serve others?” Finally, “What really matters?” All these questions had me dizzy.  I told myself, “You got me going in circles (oh round and round I go).”  I had to hit the pause button.  As entrepreneurs, the products and services we offer must meet the needs of the consumer in mind. As individuals achieving life long goals we must remember to move forward with determination to complete the task even when we may feel all alone.

Over the years, successful individuals presented me with two essential questions. (Thanks to those who always have me thinking.) First, a few people asked me what is the purpose of me pursuing my life-long goals? Secondly, I have been asked how will my purpose enhance the lives of others? Yes, those two questions allowed me to recall why I enjoy pushing and pursuing my entrepreneurial and personal goals. I realized that even though fulfilling my purpose may feel like walking through a maze there is someone searching for the gifts and talents that I had to offer. Please stay focused on the path of what you were meant to do and why it is necessary. Eventually, you will find your purpose as your purpose will also find you.

Worrying About Failure  

Whew, chile, let me share this tad bit of info!!!! My Momma, Auntie, and the people who reside with me know I have tried different ventures. Some have failed, or I didn’t have the tenacity to continue. Recently, I was all up in a frenzy as I contemplated to renew one of my LLC’s. After much prayer, meditation and contemplation, I decided to sing, “I’m saying Bye Bye” in that Aaron Hall from Guy tone voice. I didn’t have the fortitude to push or invest in this particular project any longer.

It was time for me to shift my concentration cause Big Daddy Kane was telling me, “Aint No Half-Steppin’.” I wasn’t giving up, but I had decided to concentrate on what truly gave me life. My creative energy was all over “thee” place.  I needed to downsize. I noticed I didn’t have enough time to invest in what indeed had meaning while living on this Earth.

Yep, there will be those moments when it may feel as if you have failed. Remember, you have never failed if you tried. You are going to win. Concentrate on what adds value to your life and the world. When you know what is important, tell yourself that you will, “Keep Rising to the Top and Give it all You Got!”

Give Time to the Right Projects that Makes You Sing Sweet Melodies 

You might ask yourself, “Well, how much time am I supposed to give myself?” As mentioned in the previous section, I decided to let go of a significant project I worked on for three years. Yes, there are times when we prematurely give up on a venture. However, there are instances when we have that gut feeling it is time to move on.  One of my dear sisters Lady Ton tells me when it is time to let go of a project or venture, “You Will Know.”

Closeout the chatter and get on the right keys so you can make sure it is the decision you want to make. Not because someone is pressuring you to give up. Currently, my soul is singing beautiful melodies about the projects I have been working on.  I have invested time and money for quite a few years on them. Guess what?  I don’t mind. I am giving these projects as much time as I need to. It is my purpose. I know it is making a difference in my life and will inspire others!

Yes, in these uncertain times, we may feel very uncertain. Recently, major corporations have filed bankruptcy or contemplated filing. We must accept, “It’s Like that and that’s the way it is.” But, no matter what occurs or how big or small our dreams are, we own them. Don’t feel disappointed when the outcome doesn’t unfold how you thought it would be. Please network with people who will encourage you. “Don’t Rush” the Process.

Pursue your dreams that are in your heart. It’s worth it. You might feel like what is going on and how should I fine-tune my goals. You may feel as if you are standing in an empty stadium and don’t have the support you need. Hey, “Just don’t give up it’s going to be…Alright.”  Once again, give yourself time to what is truly important to your current or future goals that will make your soul sing. When you feel like too much is going on blast a little Mary J (music that is) because you will be, “Just Fine Fine Fine Fine Fine Fine Ohhhhh!!!!!  

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

References

Alicia Keys. “Fallin’.” Songs in A Minor, J, 2001.

Big Daddy Kane.  “Ain’t No Half-Steppin’.”  Long Live the Kane, Cold Chillin, 1988.

Black Men United.  “You Will Know.”  Jason Lyric’s Original Motion Picture Soundtrack,  Rap-A-Lot Records, 1994.

Drake & Lil Baby. “Yes Indeed.”  Harder Than Ever, 4 Pockets Full, Wolfpack, Quality Control, Motown, Capitol, 2018.

Guy.  “Goodbye Love.”  Guy-Special Edition, Uptown, MCA, Warner Bros., 1998.

Keni Burke. “Risin’ To the Top.” Changes, RCA, 1982.

Ledisi. “Alright.”  Alright, Verve Forecast, 2007.

Marvin Sapp. “Never Would Have Made It.” Thirsty, Verity Records, Zomba, 2007.

Mary J. Blige.  “Just Fine.”  Growing Pains, Geffen, 2007.

Run-D.M.C.  “It’s Like That.”  Run-D.M.C., Profile Records, 1983.

The Friends of Distinction.  “You’ve Got Me Going in Circles.” Grazin’, RCA Victor, 1969.

V.I.C. “Wooble.” Beast, Warner Bros., 2008.

Young T. & Bugsey.  “Don’t Rush.”  Don’t Rush, Black Butter Records, 2019.

We Are Not All Safe While Staying at Home by Chellyz View

Raising Hands

 

We Are Not All Safe While Staying at Home by Chellyz View

Attention: This post is not directed to those who are intentionally going out just for the sake of going out, but for those who may not have a safe or comfortable space to call home.

Today, I am going to simply keep things simple! I wrote a post at the end of March about staying at home during this crisis. I know this is a matter of life or death, but everyone’s space is different. So, at this moment, I am not here to go on a rampage or soapbox about what people should or should not do. Those of us who are grown and reside in a safe and comfortable space know what’s up. Those of us who are not grown and have a safe and comfy space to live in should take heed to wisdom when our elders are trying to drop those nuggets (and not the ones from that fast food place).

Since the occurrence of the PANDEMIC, I have been looking around my home. I had to stop myself from complaining and appearing to be a tad bit ungrateful. I noticed all the flaws, the leaks, and the unfinished projects that were projected to be finished but never were. I began to feel a little frustrated. Staying at home made me realize the foundation of the inside and outside of my house, desperately needed to be fixed. I sat still for a moment, and I spoke to the Holy Spirit. I offered my thank you’s and lifted praises for having a safe place to stay. Shortly after, I made a mental note of what needed to be repaired. Some could be salvaged now, while other repairs would be completed after this partial social isolation from the world.

Next, I thought about my children. Things are not perfect, but I believe they are like me and didn’t realize how blessed they are. The two of them have their own room, own iPhone, own game console, own Smart TV, and their own iPad with the options of unlimited snacks! Well, until I tell them, “Don’t y’all snack on another nothing. You are not hungry. You are bored.” Then, I had to politely walk away from the fridge and preach the same sermon to myself.

My children don’t have the worries of sharing or fighting over who would enjoy which series or movies to watch or games to play. They don’t have to fuss unless they are restless and need to take their frustration out on someone, which is known as typical sibling rivalry.  The children, Hub, and I have enough space to scatter ourselves if we feel overwhelmed by being enclosed under one roof. Now and then, we stream and watch movies together or play board games. On a couple of Sundays, we rode out to Belle Isle just to change the scenery. Thus far, the income flows. My overdue bills are from my lack of not being a good steward over my finances. I will post about that at a later time.

Then, I thought about the rest of the world as the #stayathome movement is stressed. Some people are struck hard, and the punches sting. Some people couldn’t apply for unemployment because they may have been paid under the table, not worked long enough, or just didn’t qualify. Some households are busting through the seams because the Head of the Household has their children. Another family member may be living there with their children, then there might be an elderly family member or cousin or friend or two all sharing one common space. Living conditions may not be ideal. Stretching food has been extended to the limits. People are becoming too restless and anxious because the walls are caving in as the people are overflowing in the home.

No back porch to chill on if you are living in an apartment building.
For some, there are no long drives for a change of scenery if there’s no reliable transportation. No time to take a whole day to catch up on laundry because there is no washer or dryer. No catching up on long-overdue home improvement projects if you are renting because the landlord owns the home. The list goes on and on.

Then, I thought about the problems that haven’t disappeared though COVID has appeared. Abuse lurking leading to fists and words scarring innocent souls. Addictions brewing leading to children being neglected. The cycle of poverty is prevalent, and the reflection of pain is shown on the face of a man, woman, or child who longs to escape, but the chance of COVID attacking them is on the other side of the door. Someone out there feels trapped more than ever.

I want people to be safe, but I don’t want us to ignore the issue that everyone doesn’t have the option of feeling safe in a comfortable space. What do we do?

I can tell you what I must do! I am more thankful, I am praying for healing, I am requesting protection for those who need it, I am providing resources when possible, I am pleading for a cure, I am asking for Mercy, and I am taking this life one day at a time. Cause staying safe in a comfortable space ain’t an option for everyone.

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

 

Photo by Luis Dalvan from Pexels

The Season of Cancellation by Chellyz View

Canceled

The Season of Cancellation by Chellyz View

I woke up one day and felt like major events disappeared. Can you believe it? At this moment, there will be no proms or send-offs, graduations, senior trips, baby showers, weddings or receptions, shopping for that new Easter (Resurrection) Day outfit, most likely the school year, and the Auto Show. Ok, you know what I am trying to say. Canceled!!!

What a difference a day, a season, or a whole moment makes! I was excited. Not one, two, but I had three trips planned this year, not including the one recently taken in the ATL. In February before the widespread pandemic, the children and I went to Georgia to celebrate my brother-in-law’s 40th and nephew’s 17th birthdays!!!! Feeling a little nervous at the time, we still took the trip with prayer in my heart and hope in my head that the Holy Spirit would protect us on the journey. Thankfully, we made it, but the war on Covid-19 is still raging.

The enemy is attacking, and the number of casualties on the battlefield keeps rising. I keep hearing Hot Spot. Hot Spot. Detroit is a Hot Spot. Not too long ago, we were becoming one of the hottest spots as it related to regrowth in certain areas. That’s up for another discussion. Cobo Hall, now known as the TCF Center, is being transformed into a temporary hospital to house the sick and shut-in. I am trying to shut out the news and my addiction to scrolling through social media because a Sistah is getting Anxious.

As this goes on, I am thinking about how I keep hearing canceled. What about people who need treatment for ongoing illnesses? What about people who might be experiencing a Heart Attack, Stroke, or need immediate attention. You can call 911, but they ain’t trying to take you to the hospital. They stress you don’t want to go if you don’t need to. So what happens when you are sick, but it may not be related to the Cov?

What else is going on in the world? Did all other situations, crimes, and so on and so on stop? What about bills? Don’t worry! Right? I hear you need to call and make payment arrangements. Evictions are temporarily put to a halt. Cell phones and internet services are not being disconnected at this time. Utilities are not supposed to be touched. What will happen eventually? Will are debts be canceled, and we start from zero?

Businesses are closing. Will many survive? For example, damn the ones that did stay afloat on Detroit’s Westside Avenue of Fashion from the recent construction feel like they are drowning once again. Who will make it through? Employers are laying off. That means some paychecks are canceled. This is some historical ish, and I don’t like the look or smell of it. Hey, we don’t want to face tough times, but it’s something we must go through to be more humble, rediscover our purpose, and understand the Divine Plan.

Well, though this is the season of Spring, it feels like the Season of Cancellation. Right now, I am canceling out Corona and demanding once it’s gone that it never returns. I know the clouds are hovering over the universe, and people feel this is a losing battle. However, I need you to cancel those negative thoughts. Those of us left are soldiers who must continue to fight!!!! Affirmative!!!!

New beginning

After all of this, please believe There’s a Higher Power!!!!! All that is happening is going to be canceled out. If you need to break down and cry out for a minute, please do so!!!!!! Hell, the Earth is hurting, but we must do our part to ensure this thang gets canceled. This is the Season of Cancellation!!! However, once it’s over, be ready to welcome the cycle of New Beginnings. Be Blessed!!!!

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

What the Hell You Mean Stay Home? by Chellyz View

edwin-hooper-Q8m8cLkryeo-unsplash

What the Hell You Mean Stay Home! by Chellyz View

A few weeks before the “Stay at Home” mandate, which means only leave out for essential business, I was feeling too busy! Every day after work, there was something to be done. My son had rehearsals, and my daughter had appointments. I attended meetings here and there for personal development, the new semester of my weekly Biblical Bible Class was beginning, off to an empowering event, outings with a few friends, and there were extracurricular workshops for the kids on an early Saturday morning. That’s the shortlist. I told a few of my co-workers; I needed a moment to rest and take a break from all the extras in life. Who knew it would happen like this! Suddenly, the whole world was disrupted. This terrifying nightmare isn’t what I imagined, planned, or ordered.

When I had the opportunity to work remotely from home and slow down a bit, I wasn’t bothered. I am at a place where I love being in company with myself.  I enjoy streaming and watching a movie or mini-series with the help of Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon Prime with or without the Fam. I act a fool while having my private dance parties jamming to Classic R & B, Trap Music, the latest hits, or Old Skool Hip Hop. I debate with the online radio as I consume the information. Let me not forget my participation in Praise and Worship services by watching Kingdom on Facebook, googling a sermon online, or listening to some Good Ol’ Gospel Music to Lift My Spirits. As you can see, I didn’t have a difficult time adjusting because I can be an introvert at heart. However, this is not the case for everyone!

The Stay at Home Order could be a life sentence for many. The order can be very depressing and challenging for those who don’t know how to rest, deal with loneliness, trying to escape abuse, or may not have a place of their own to call home. Yes, some people don’t have a home to stay in.  This order can be overwhelming by not being able to socialize with others in the outside world, and you may feel isolated while working from home. Seniors who are homebound may feel helpless. Students are missing their teachers and peers. Well, maybe not the students who felt bullied at school or the personnel suffering from burnout. Young folks want to be young and live their best life. In times like these, we must be creative and obedient when the order is to “Stay Home,” if possible!!!!

If you need fresh air, open a window. I am going to sit on my back porch (not in a large group). If you feel lonely, phone a friend, start a group chat, or contact a distant or elderly relative. Keep a journal. Color. Do a crossword puzzle. Read a magazine or a book. Oh, you can talk to other members of your household. Exercise. From a spiritual perspective, read the Word!!!! Play board games. Organize. Find a free online class. For those who live alone, find virtual meetings that might pique your interest. Call a hotline if you feel you can’t cope. Ask for resources. Senior apartment building managers develop a phone buddy list for neighbors to check on each other.

I know there are many activities we can do to keep our minds right, but follow the rules and only go outside if you must. I know there are the front line and essential workers that don’t have the option to stay home. I am praying for your safety. I am forever thankful for your service. Too many precious lives have succumbed to this devastating illness.

Doors Closed

Yes, I know this is not going to last forever. I have hope. I try to be as cautious as I can when I must go to the store. The hub doesn’t have the option to stay home, and he still must go to work. I replace Fear with Faith. Yet, let me be honest. I have moments when I feel afraid or burdened with grief because I hear of an individual dying, a loved one is suffering, or someone else sharing a story of how this disease invaded their lives. I fervently pray that Covid-19 doesn’t show up at my door.

Many lessons are being revealed. We must learn to listen, pay attention, and guess what? Do something many of us don’t know how to do. Stay Home! We will find out how disconnected we are in our lives because we have been connected to what we thought was important. As stated in an earlier post, this lesson is more profound than just washing our hands. It is a lesson about how the Earth is being cleansed from selfishness, greediness, disobedience, and understanding we should not idolize material things.

Our biggest enemy is ourselves. Many of us don’t want to follow the rules. We want to be above the law. How dare anyone tell us what to do. Many continue to congregate in large crowds, people are coughing on produce as a joke, some megachurches are still holding Sunday Services, and there are other examples where we won’t stop moving. We won’t listen. The Holy Spirit, or what you believe in, is trying to tell us to be still, take heed, and become more disciplined. Once we learn how to do this, then the process of true healing will begin in this nation!

-Let your heart be full of new ventures that will lead you to the possibilities of limitless conversations!

RESOURCES:

https://detroitmi.gov/departments/detroit-health-department/programs-and-services/communicable-disease/coronavirus-covid-19

https://www.mi211.org/get-help/crisis-services

https://psychcentral.com/lib/depression-hotline-numbers/

https://www.clickondetroit.com/news/local/2020/03/15/list-food-services-provided-for-children-students-during-coronavirus-outbreak/

https://www.sba.gov/page/coronavirus-covid-19-small-business-guidance-loan-resources

Featured Image:  Photo by Edwin Hooper on Unsplash